OPENNESS IS A FOUNDATION TO HAPPY LOVE LIFE

Sophie Mubvumbi Jayawardene

Over the past year I had received numerous letters from all walks of life. Do you have a boyfriend, a partner till the question where more directive to sexual partner? A recent one from a young male got me thinking of what I may have portray in my activism.

Dear Sophie, he wrote. I am embarrassed to yet ask again about your love life. Does that mean you can not be in love, If so would another person sleep with you if they knew you are HIV positive. Very curious George

Let me explain why I had consciously evade the conversations based on one's sexual life. Life in it's self depend on oneself 's attitude. Being shamed of being HIV positive, not having informative information on HIV/AIDS and the stigma surrounding this, taught me that, as long as I maintain secrecy that surrounds my sexual organ I will never be loved by someone the way I want him to love me. The level of enjoyment in a sexual relationship full of secrecy was somehow sickening from my experience. In many cases I had felt rotten to someone who had invested time and genuine love for me. Then I wake up three months later and say, "Guess was I am HIV positive" It does not work like that.

I discover that no matter how much you love  someone, how far your relationship goes depends on what is being  communicated. There is no perfect way of presenting myself to a potential lover but in my world openness is a foundation

My attitude to life became more of what I would like to experience. That was a challenge. I needed to experience life in it's all forms. If he was to be mine would he really walk away? All dates are no different. HIV positive or not, everyone meet rejection along the way. When I had encountered all the possibility of rejection and the positive of being open to my HIV status. I began to see my ' I had thought not so desirable private parts" as desirable from a man's heart, the one that was meant for me.  I learn to accept rejection gracefully like a lady. I had accepted what I am, grabbed my pride  back on.


Adding to my profile as from now I will pay attention when questions such as sex comes by. Because there is a lot of us who are still grieving that part of life we lost. With more information and improved life for people who live with the HIV virus. Loving someone depends on how you see yourself. Openness a desired attitude to happy love life.Sex and love in very much related , development and success depends on what one desire to achieve